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Reflux and Baby Sleep: What No One Wants to Talk About (But We Need To)

If I’m being honest, I’ve been avoiding talking about reflux because I hate that it doesn’t have a quick fix.


Truth bomb: babies with reflux often struggle more to fall asleep independently because they need extra support from us parents.

And honestly? How could we blame them.


Babies with reflux tend to be fussy and cranky once you put them down
Babies with reflux tend to be fussy and cranky once you put them down

What I see in consultations all the time:

  • Babies who can only fall asleep while being held.

  • Parents holding their newborns upright for 20 minutes after every feeding because the moment they’re laid on their back, the pain starts.

  • Lots of frustration and guilt around deciding whether medication is the right option.

  • Babies who still struggle to fall asleep independently even with medication.

  • Babies waking up more often in the middle of the night.


You are not alone in this. This is so common.


Why does reflux impact sleep?

Because babies learn a very understandable pattern:feed → fall asleep in parents’ arms → wake → repeat.


And NO — this is not a “bad habit.”How could holding your baby to sleep to prevent pain be a bad habit? Truly.


But here’s where it gets tricky: when your baby wakes up in the middle of the night, their brain goes:“I need to feed and be in mom or dad’s arms. That’s the only way I know how to fall asleep.”


And this is where we hit a wall: How the heck am I supposed to teach my baby to

sleep independently if they’re in pain?


The good news

Reflux eventually goes away. Babies outgrow it, and that awful burning sensation stops because milk stops coming back up.Or, under your pediatrician’s guidance, medication can help tremendously.

But either way… you may still end up with a baby whose only sleep association since birth has been sleeping in your arms.

So the question becomes: what can you do now?


How to Support Sleep When Your Baby Has Reflux

1. Build a healthy sleep foundation — even if you’re still holding your baby to sleep.

Yes, even if you’re holding them upright every time.

This looks like:

  • Focusing on wake windows so your baby doesn’t get overtired or undertired

  • Knowing your baby’s sleep needs

  • Creating a sleep-friendly environment for naps and nighttime

  • Having an age-appropriate schedule


These things matter — and they make a difference even during a reflux phase.


2. Optimize your sleep. Seriously.

If your baby won’t sleep on their back, then you need a survival plan.

If you have a partner, or your mom, or anyone helping you, the goal is this: each adult gets at least 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep.


It might look like:

  • One parent handles baby from 8pm–1/2am while the other sleeps

  • Then switch: the other parent handles 2am–7/8am


If someone can come help during the day? Nap. Do it. You need it.

This stage is hard — you should not be doing it alone or running on fumes.


3. Wait until the reflux is under control.

Whether it’s medication or simply waiting for baby to outgrow it, independent sleep will be so much easier (and more humane) once the pain is not part of the picture.


4. Once reflux improves, check the age.

I usually recommend waiting until your baby is at least 6 months old before working on independent sleep.


By then, reflux is often much better, sleep needs are more predictable, and babies are developmentally ready.


A little reminder for my tired parents…

So many families go through this. If your baby is struggling, it’s not your fault. You’re not doing anything wrong. You’re doing exactly what a loving parent does — helping your baby feel safe and comfortable.


You’ve got this .And when you’re ready, I’m here to help. 💛


Here are some resources to learn more about reflux, but remember that your go-to should be your pediatrician.


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